Monday, May 1, 2017

Garden 3.0 (Week 6)

I did it! It's the first time I've ever put up a trellis for my peas. It's hardly even noticeable, but the two closest rows have trellis nets in between the two posts. I left the far row without a trellis to see what the difference in yield will be.
The trellis netting is very fine and the posts are super slim. I hope they will be able to hold up the peas, especially since the netting is held on by twist ties I found in the pantry. Sophisticated, I know.
The onions and carrots are barely doing anything, nothing much to report.
On a side note: Once again it snowed on the peas, making them a true Snow Pea. 

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Hoth,

Look, I’m writing you again because I somewhat enjoy our digital time together. A digital date, of sorts… I’ll buy the Papa Murphy’s, my treat! (Actually, you ought to look at buying their stock. It’s only going up from here. They accept food stamps, Hoth, so you know it’s going to be a win! Also, I got the stock tip from The Onion, so you know that they understand the food biz!)

Look, I’ve been watching you for a while now. Kind of like the phantom of the opera, I’m Erik and you are Christine, but it’s not sexual. I know the song, you should ask me about it sometime. Actually, it’s hard not to watch you, I can usually see your head out of the corner of my eye. However, I imagine you can see me a lot better. To quote a nursery rhyme… “What big eyes you have”.

Also, I found a fallacy in your post so… Here’s a free lesson:

Yours - “but the two closest row have trellis nets in between the two posts.”
Mine - “but the two closest rows have trellis nets in between the two posts.”

Look, now that I have my MBA, I think I’m qualified to give you my professional opinion.

In my professional opinion, you’re coming on a walk with me every day. I don’t mean to be forceful. I am not a bully, got it? Look, I’m a reasonable guy. As long as you are doing what I want, we are good. Anyway, back on track. Do I like the snow peas? You bet! The trellis seems erect enough and I agree that you can only hope that it will hold up your peas. You don’t want a droopy pea, trust me. There is a reason I never wear shorts……

The peas will scratch your legs while in the garden of course, sicko. Trust me, I’m an MBA.


Look, I’m hoping your onio…

Sorry, I saw a penny on the ground and had to grab it.

Look, I’m hoping your onions and carrots come in soon. The garden is really a lackluster performance right now. From a marketing standpoint, you really need to connect with your audience here. Hoeing will only bring in a certain type of audience; you get it. Also, you should plant some tater babies.

Coming from a top performer, you should take my advice. All top performers understand that the common denominator in the success equation is performing at the top. If you aren’t performing at the top, then you can count yourself out of ever becoming a top performer. And, if you aren’t going to be a top performer, why would you even perform at all? All top performers know that without a top performance, performing is always going to lead to a less than top performing performance. Look, the math just doesn’t add up.

As your self-assigned mentor and life coach, I wish you a plentiful harvest.

Until next week.


Signed,

Anonymous, MBA